There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
