some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
