i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
So vagazzling was a success
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