Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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