Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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