what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
