is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize