You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
