weddingsv make me drug and hornr
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
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