quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I just sucked dick on a ferry
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
