I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
