I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
