If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
