$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
