like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
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