The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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