If you die in college, do you die in real life?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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