Come see our sink grown plant.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
