Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
