your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
