You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
