R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
