roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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