I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
