I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
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