So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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