your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
