honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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