4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Randomize
