remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
