That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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