life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
