I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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