erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Is it because I queefed?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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