We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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