I cockslap morals
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
