remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
