Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
