Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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