Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Liz is crying about burritos again.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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