I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
