Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize