I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
