So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Randomize
