I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Randomize
