Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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