Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
this just has baby written all over it
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
