you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
