if you like me you must not know who I am
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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