you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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