Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
