dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
